Cry out the past

From past and time and now again, to feel so kept from the things you love and hold dear. To wake up and realize that what you felt and how you feel has gotten stronger. To remember the past is to remember all the pain the suffering turning to a bottle of clonidine to sleep forever never to wake and when you don't you try to cut open a vain trying to drift into the seam.This is insane to feel so alone to be left out just because the way you think is not what they want!To be ripped apart from the inside of your heart for your mother your mother the woman who gave you life to say your not her son she rather you dead she'd rather you gone do you call that a mom. to have a dad who doesnt look at you just looks past, in his eyes his only son dies and the moon sets then and at that night he tries to end it again.